LOVE AND PHYSIOLOGY

UNDERSTANDING SOCIAL PSYCHOLOGY IN LOVE

WHAT DO YOU THINK IS THE SINGLE most important and influential factor in determining with whom you form romantic relationship ? You might be surprised to learn that the answer is simple: the person with whom you have the most contact. This most important factor is PROXIMITY. You are most likely to be friends with people you have contact with. It is simply easier to form relationships with people you see often because you have the opportunity to get to know them. One of the reasons why PROXIMITY matters to ATTRACTION, is that it breeds FAMILIARITY, people are more attracted to that which is familiar. Just being around with someone or being exposed to them increases the likelihood that we will be attracted to them. We also tend to feel safe with familiar people, as it is likely we know what to expect from them. There is certain comfort in knowing what to expect from others; consequently, research suggests that we like what is familiar. While this is often in the subconscious level, this is one of the most basic principles of attraction.

SIMILARITY IS ANOTHER FACTOR that influences who we form relationships with. We are more likely to become friends or lovers with someone who is similar to us in background, attitudes and lifestyles. In fact, there is no evidence that opposites attract. Rather, we are attracted to people who are most like us. Why do you think we are attracted to people who are similar to us ? Sharing things in common will certainly makes it easy to get along with others and form connections. When you and another person share similar music, tastes, hobbies, food preferences and so on, deciding what to do with your time together might be easy.


OUR ASSOCIATION AMONG OTHERS

HOMOPHILY IS THE TENDENCY for people to form social networks; including friendships, marriage, business relationships and many other type of relationships with others who are similar. But, homophily limits our exposure to diversity. By forming relationships only with people who are similar to us, we will have homogenous groups and will not be exposed to different points of view. In other words, because we are likely to spend time with those who are most like ourselves, we will have limited exposure to those who are different from ourselves, including people of different races, ethnicities, social-economic states, and life situations.

ONCE WE FORM RELATIONSHIPS with people, we deserve reciprocity. We contribute to relationships, but we expect to receive benefits as well. That is we want our relationships to be a 2 way street. We more likely to like and engage with people who likes us back. Self-disclosure is part of the 2 way street. We form more intimate connections with people with whom we disclose important information about ourselves. Indeed, self-disclosure is a healthy characteristics of a healthy intimate relationship, as long as the information disclosed is constant with our views.


THEORIES AND LOGIC IN PRACTICE

WE TYPICALLY LOVE THE PEOPLE with whom we form relationships, but the type of love we have for our families, friends and lovers differs. A healthy relationships will have all the 3 components of love—- INTIMACY, PASSION, AND COMMITMENT which is described as CONSUMMATE LOVE. HOWEVER, DIFFERENT ASPECTS OF LOVE MIGHT BE MORE PREVALENT AT DIFFERENT LIFE STAGES. CORELATIONS CAN IDENTIFY NTERESTING RELATIONSHIPS, BUT THEY USUALLY CANNOT PROVIDE STRONG EVIDENCE FOR WHY THAT RELATIONSHIP EXISTS.