LOVE IS EVERYTHING

BREAKING THE SORROWS IN LOVE

WHEN YOUR LOVED ONE WALKS AWAY like there was nothing between the 2 of you, the chemical reactions that go on inside the unrequited lover’s body are similar to the loss of a loved one. You feel unconsolably hut, broken and shattered. Although emotional pain is different from physical pain, a break-up or rejection literally causes your heart in a way that you feel it breaking inside your chest like it was physically happening. Then again you are angry at yourself being in that situation and resent to destructive means, like smoking, drinking and extreme cases, even attempt to commit suicide. You start planning ways to reverse the past and get the person back into the relationship. It’s not a matter of chance that rejection feels like death of a loved one. When we lose someone, we grieve. But death is not the only trigger. Any kid of loss causes grief: the loss of a job, a home, a limb, a relationship.

IN ORDER TO UNDERSTAND GRIEF, we need to understand 5 stages that it sinks in—– denial, anger, bargaining, sadness, and acceptance. Initially, it is difficult for an unrequited lover to accept reality. They most simply refuse to believe it. With morning light, senses returns. Lookin at the situation clearly and analyzing the causes and reactions of the past situations leads anger—- at themselves, for their actions, or at the partner, for having left them alone, or rejecting them.

IN MOST CASES, THE ONES WHO truly loves, gets over the past sooner and tries to reconcile. However, the relationship is not just meant to be, and they learn that soon enough ! Once they realize things are not going to change, sadness sets in. The period for mourning is different for everyone, but time heals, and it does !


LETTING GO OF PAIN AND SORROWS

THESE ORDER OF OCCURENCE OF THESE STAGES doesn’t necessarily have to be the same. Each stage may occur repeatedly and simultaneously, and may even return years after the person has consciously moved on. Sometimes, it is close to impossible to let go of the person and memories. When you grieve for a loss for a very long time, your condition is called ” Pathological(or complicated) Grief. “

POINTS IN DECIPHERING THE CONDITIONS OF GRIEF

You cannot stop thinking about what leads to the loss.
Everything happening around you inadvertently made you think about the object of love.
You experience extreme sorrow, tearfulness or desire for the lost relationship.
You keep away from news of your beloved, because it doesn’t stop emotionally accepting you.
You often dream about good old days or about the person.
You cannot stop feeling pity for yourself and are often cursing destiny for the loss.
You find it difficult to trust and love people in general.
You find it difficult to find joy in day-to-day activities.

IMPACT OF A LOVE LOST IN OUR LIVES

AS UNREQUITED LOVERS OBSESSIVELY holds on to a loss in complicated grief, the condition may end up becoming a serious obsessive compulsive disorder. LOW LEVEL OF SEROTONIN MAY TRIGGER OVER-THINKING, LONGING, CRIPPLING ANXIETY, AND THE PHYSICAL YEARNING FOR THE OBJECT OF LOVE. THE DOPAMINE REACTION TRIGGGERED BY THIS SORT OF LONGING LEADS THE BROKEN LOVER TO BEG FORGIVENESS AND EVEN SUBMIT TO UNREASONABLE DEMANDS OF THE LOVE OBJECT.

ON THE OTHER HAND, WHEN THERE IS NO CHANCE OF BARGAINING TO REACH AN AGREEMENT, THEY OFTEN DISPLAYS FITS OF FEROCIOUS ANGER OVER THE LOSS.